We all love having friends around and sometimes it’s just the gut feeling we have that they are only there for benefits. You’re reading this article rn probably because of that gut feeling and trust me when I say this- this is not a perfect world and we can’t find perfect people. However, on the contrary there are really genuine people too but it’s just that they are hard to find. We love to go all out on our friends but somehow there is just that small percentage of so called friends who are selfish and only there to get something out of you.
I thought about this topic and came up with 5 easy to identify traits for you to realize if your friends are using you. The outcome of this realization is not to pick up a fight and cut them out of your life- but just to know who your friends are and to keep a good arms length distance and associate.
- They remember you only when they have issues.
One of the biggest traits to know if a friend is using you is this. Let it be for some advice, money or even to just past time- these kind of friends will not care in what situation you are in, they just need your 100% attention and focus. There is a catch too- even by any chance if you given them advice they will NOT listen to you and call you up back to complain when they screwed up.
2. They use you to get information.
Ever wondered how a friend of yours ended up doing something you were asked the opinion of? Yes, if your friend just casually asks details about a certain thing- especially if that’s something you are doing that is simply to get your ideas and copy you. Exploiters are bad and these are the kind of friends you need to keep your eye on. Supporting friends and just taking their ideas are two different aspects in totally different worlds.
3. They don’t support you.
This trait reminds me of dessert. Jelly. We all have that one friend who simply needs you to worship them and keep them on a pedestal but as soon as you are talking about yourself or simply just achieve something in life they just go bonkers and overflow with jealousy. Jealousy is a very natural feeling many people have when they feel threatened and their ego is tapped a little. The reason why these kinds of friends are using you is because they don’t support you and never will be genuinely happy for you. They just use you because you are so good in boosting their self esteem and they only seek a one sided friendship.
4. They don’t have your back when you need them.
Friends are always people in your life you can count on and that is the best part of a friendship. If you ever had friends who picked sides on you then this is something to think about. As a person I love a friend who can stand up for me and just break awkwardness and just say “Hey, what the hell were you thinking?!” every once in a while. Maybe that kind of friend is you and if you are, your friends are lucky to have you. Just make sure people don’t use you for your niceness and kindness. That makes it easy for them to take you for granted and wash your hands and walk over you.
5. They “totally slipped their mind” for you.
If your friend doesn’t make time or any effort at all to the friendship, chances are that your friendship is one sided. There is no doubt about it because they just are associating you to get anything done. If you care for a person you will at least drop a text and ask how things are going. No one will ever be that busy and no proper friend needs to “check their schedule” to hang out with you. You just hang. That’s the beauty of friendship. If you ever feel like you’re the only one trying to keep the friendship alive- this is a sign that you are being used.
All said and done, we all have to understand that everyone goes thorugh different things in their lives and maybe sometimes timing is not at the best. We are all humans and we act this way becuase of it. However, like I said before some people are just pure evil and just “show” that they are nice because they have a hidden agenda and expect something out of you. Now saying this, it doesn’t mean that your friend is a bad person if he/ she needs help or gets into trouble. You just know the lousy kind and yes, I know this article reminded you of a certain friend/s of yours. So be smart and keep the friendship rolling!
Hope that you guys enjoyed reading this article!